Hello and Hisa-Bisa Howdy

Blogosphere! Glorious blogosphere! So long have I avoided your outstretched arms and ignored your pleas for more incoherent ramblings. Do not fear. I'll be back to avoiding you right after this.

All is well. Insane, but well. Our kitchen has a curse on it, it seems: we've lost the most people (5 in all) over the past year than any other kitchen in the hotel. This means we have a workload meant for 20 or so people, and we are making do with 12. Oh glorious day. Also, for all of April I will be absent from the kitchen as well. And considering all the menial tasks I'm in charge of that will have to be delegated to someone else, it's no wonder April is all anyone will talk about.

See, here's the thing about April. March is graduating month: culinary schools are thrusting their newly certified ex-students into the working world, and the hotels are carefully sorting through hundreds of resumes and narrowing their choices down to about 50-70. April is when they officially start work, as trainees, of course. For a month they're tossed about the different sections of the hotel - doesn't matter if you applied for a job in the kitchen or the cloakroom, you're forced to make your rounds with your fellow trainees to get a feel for the hotel you're about to commit your life to.

I've been here 9 months now, but I've been on a seperate contract, so I'll be spending April with the rest of the newly-employed. Yes, this means I will be not only be spending time in every kitchen, but will also be doing banquet, restaurant, and room service, plus some dabbling in dishwashing and lobby attending. Horror! Me, unleashed on the public! I'm sure dreadful shenanigans will ensue. You'll be the first to hear about them too, promise.

I dangled a cunning little hint of my extracurricular activities in my New Year's post... none of you noticed, but it was mainly for my own sake, anyway. No wait, that's a lie. I want you to know every detail about my life because I am a narcissist and an attention-whore. That being said - I'm going to London! As a professional translator! For the Japanese representative at the cooking Olympics!!! Well, not THE cooking Olympics - she'll be competing in the cooking section of the World Skills Olympics. And I'm to be her personal translator. Meaning I have to get under her skin, learn the way she cooks, WHAT she'll cook, what's IN what she cooks, and in what order she will cook what she cooks, and be able to know the process in English, French, and Japanese so that if she needs help, she'll be able to immediately get it. Pshaw, SO easy. No pressure at all.

Actually, I kind of mean that. It's in 7 months, and I'll be going down to Hiroshima twice a month to meet with her - next meeting is in Nagasaki, actually. The people in charge keep changing their minds. Not that I care - the more exotic places I get to visit, the happier I am.

In other news, it is no secret that I am a complete and utter Anglophile. England holds me in her thrall (I am actually unsure if 'thrall' is meant to be used as a noun in this way but no matter, proper grammar evades me at this hour) and has done ever since Bill Nigh the Coked-Up Science Guy (oh, marry me). About 80% of my favourite authors are/were British. British film, art, literature, spelling and pronunciation... just seems better.

So when Steve Moffat and Mark Gatiss of Dr. Who legend decided to remake Sherlock Holmes? I jumped right on that train, and then gleefully hopped in front of it and let it run me over. You know. As you do.

If I recommend nothing else to you this entire year, at least I will have passed this onto you. Watch it. You will not regret it. In fact, you may just sacrifice your firstborn child's soul to me, because you will be so grateful. SO grateful. That I recommended this to you.

I'll be back with more toe-curling tales of thrilling adventure in no time. While you wait... may I suggest Sherlock? Oh, did I already? I apologise.