How Do I Love Thee?

Let me count the ways.

...

Wait, before I do that, let me think about what love is, really.

To be honest, Love, as a subject, has been on my mind quite a bit lately. Hence the silly opening lines above.

A friend and I were talking recently, and the subject of love came up, as it somehow inevitably always does. She told me, firmly and in no uncertain terms, that she did not believe in real love before 18. Anything before that, according to her sound logic, was nothing but puppy love; thus, relationships that start young always end in separation and/or divorce.

I admit I went quiet for a little before switching to a completely different topic. Not exactly subtle of me, but I hadn't had the time to fully analyze the subject and wasn't comfortable talking on it.

Love's always been a touchy subject for me; I, myself, tend to have a hard time differentiating between loving someone and being in love.

I figure this is because of the situation I was brought up in. My entire childhood was spent amongst dozens of adults, most of them in healthy physical and emotional relationships. Thus, from a young age I've looked on public displays of affection as normal, not something to think twice on.

Also, love was a very natural, every-day thing. Saying "I love you" not only became habitual but also reflexive, as it was said to me and around me so frequently. Physical contact, in the form of hugs or even just pats on the shoulder, was also a constant - which may explain why I automatically hug people when I first see them and when we part, although it doesn't explain why I've grown a sort of aversion to being touched unnecessarily. But that's something I don't plan on delving into just yet.

Since my entire life was spent in such a loving, sheltered atmosphere, the whole concept of "love" in general has become somewhat nondescript to me. I don't value it like I should, which is the sad but honest truth. I have become such a loving person that having someone tell me they love me, even in a serious, relationship-oriented way, isn't something I'd lose sleep over, debating my answer; I'll automatically respond in kind, because it's been ingrained into my mind that if someone tells me they love me, it's only polite for me to feel the same way. And the problem is, ever since I was little, I did love every one I lived with - in a platonic way, of course - and so I had no trouble with this logic and proceeded to live a life very full of love.

(I realise that I've begun to ramble but this is kind of a self-discovering post, so please bear with me.)

So...I suppose I do believe in love before 18. Why? Because emotions are so very flighty.

I think it's definitely probable for a person to be truly in love with someone at 16 in a way that someone at 30 couldn't, for the simple reason that the way every person's minds and hearts work are so individual. I think it's unfair to group everyone under 18 together and claim that they don't have enough emotional depth to feel anything other than fleeting puppy-love.

I do agree that inexperience does have a large impact on young people's ability to comprehend real love; for example, I understand that a 14 year old may have sex for the first time and misinterpret the inevitable connection that forms for love. I myself was naive enough to make this mistake. But not everyone's emotions are so easily manipulated. Like I said, no one person is the same as any one else.

Okay, now that I've officially begun to Not Make Sense, I'll conclude here.

Kudos to you if you actually read that whole thing.

really?
i mean, really?